Friday, November 07, 2008

The winding road ahead...

Have you heard the song "Jesus Take the Wheel" by Carrie Underwood? If not, you can click HERE. The song is kind of depressing and I'm not, by any means, depressed. So that isn't the point. The point is that, no matter how "in control" we would like to be and often feel we are, that is a simple lie we tell ourselves. Whether you have tendencies to be a very controlling person, or whether you are more laid back and easy-going, nobody likes to think that their life is out of control. Well, not usually. This blog is a reflection just as much for me as for you. It is me recognizing and reminding myself for the 9,497, 842nd time that I am NOT in control.

Sometimes the road I'm on is gorgeous. Its the road that winds up and over the greenest grass and tallest mountains. Its the road I sense when Aaron asks me to marry him or when I find out that I'm finally at 100% support and can leave for Colombia. Its the road when I often forget to thank God for the green and the mountains because all is well in the world. We like this road. Its easy. Its fun. But it can be dangerous if we forget to recognize who laid the road out before us.

You may then quite suddenly find yourself in a valley. Its damp, its deep, and you are surrounded by seemingly insurmountable difficulties. This is when none of my dreams seem to be coming true, no doors are opening, and God seems to be just standing around on the other side of the mountain, totally out of sight. Its when I can't figure out which fork to take and I wonder what on earth God is trying to teach me. Its when my family is struggling, and I can do nothing to help. Its when I'm homesick and feel that I'v failed, its when the economy drops and my support shrinks a few digits. But this is when, as you have been trying to drive the impossible road, you must stop, pull over, try to see the beauty in the valley, and let Jesus take the wheel.

It is possible that after you finally leave the valley, in full expectation of arriving back on top, you enter the cold. The damp has frozen over, your car is dirty and tired, You have tried to re-take the wheel in thinking that your way will surely be better than the Lord's, and your gas light is warning you that you have almost run out of yourself. Its a lonely road. You have friends all around but you don't feel their holding hands nor can you hear the mute words of comfort they say. You are alone. This is when my friends forget my birthday, when my parents have too much on their plate to add my problems, its when Aaron is in his own world, out of touch with my needs, and when all I have worked for is on the brink of freezing over and cracking. Oh but look around you. Look at the snow-covered mountains that, while they seem out of reach, are still within view. Look at the branches weighted down with fresh snow. Listen to the stillness. The muted voices are only so because the Lord wants you to hear only ONE voice; HIS voice. And so we wait. We listen. We don't like having to rely so heavenly on Him. We want our control back. Just give me back my wheel GOD! If only Zoe would be quiet and listen to the one who knows the road better than any map or guide. Be still and KNOW that He is the only savior.

Then there is the traffic-infested, bright-lights-all-around, can't-get-a-word-in-edgewise, too-much-stuff-to-do road. Its a mouth-full to say cause its a truck-load to do! You don't know where to start and you feel closed in with a schedule that seems impossible. Its when I have nine projects to work on in 2 days when the last month was slow as snails. Its the months of planning my wedding from over-seas and wondering where the busy lights will take my future husband and I. Its wondering if, at any point, I'm going to try and switch lanes but run into the car next to me. Its wondering if the "policeman" will pull me over for reckless driving or speeding. But its a rush. Its fun. It swerves and moves. The river of cars curves and moves at lightening speed and its pure adrenaline that allows you to keep up. You may pull into your driveway worn-out. BUt you won't ever forget that ride you had! I suppose we could say its the road I'm on now. I can hardly catch my breath but am still not ready to get out of the car.

I pray for you my friend. I pray for you, my family. That whichever road you find yourself on today, whether it be one of these described or a different road all together, that you will soon find yourself at one common destination. It is at the foot of the Cross. Whether you see it on the horizon yet or not, you must know that it is there. Perhaps the less you try to search it out the more quickly you will find yourself under its shelter. BUt you will, precious friend, find yourself there. The Lord is faithful. He will lead you there. Just let Him take the wheel. Put away your earthly maps. Look to the Father. You can find my favorite song by Hillsong HERE. Listen, and rest.

QUOTE: “You often meet your fate on the road you take to avoid it”
A French proverb


Jill said...

Awesome blog, very encouraging!!! Thanks for sharing your thoughts and heart... Love you!

Jill said...

Just updated my blog ;) love u!